Doubt

I’ve been sharing how I’m so excited to publish my first book. In fact, I can’t wait till I have the money needed to do so. However, lately I’ve been having some doubt on whether my book is truly ready or not. There are questions I find myself asking myself and they truly are creating fear. What if my book is not as ready as I think it is?

Where doubt started

So, as you know, I’ve been doing a lot more reading lately. As I read the book, I don’t just enjoy the story as a reader, but I note things as a writer. I pay attention to the way things are described. The way the main characters inner monologue goes. How does the story all flow and run together? I pay attention to the suspense factors when there are some. And then I think about my book and how it was written and I start questioning whether my book has that where I need it and how I want to portray it.

Other reviews

I’ve mentioned before that I have been watching a lot of BookTube and listening to their reviews on books. As I watch, I pay attention to what they are saying, especially when they are reviewing a fantasy book. One of the things I hear a lot is how the first book needs to have a lot of world building, but not in a way that takes away from the story. Do I have that? Then certain things need to be explained. I know I have an aspect of my book that I did not explain in the first book. Is that going to hurt me? Again the doubt comes in. Is my book ready?

professionals

On my Instagram account I follow a lot of accounts for writers. They are constantly posting encouragement and advice for new authors who are working on publishing their first book. Some of the things are super encouraging, and I’m thankful for it. However, some of the advice gets me thinking about my book. The way I write POVs (point of views) doesn’t seem to match with what they are saying I should pay attention to. Again, this gets me thinking. Will this harm me?

blog stories

Now some of you are probably wondering if I wrestle with these same doubts when I write my blog stories. The short answer. No. These stories are never aimed at publication possibilities. They are aimed at helping me grow as an author and play in different genres of books. These stories are not being analysed by me to see if they are good enough to publish as a book. In fact, it’s just for fun. And my blog is a safe place for me to play with it. I would say that the only thing that would cause me some doubt with these is if the reader enjoys them and sees the potential. If people won’t enjoy these stories, will they bother buying my book when I do publish?

trying to push past doubt

So, now I have two choices. One, I can sit in my doubt and let it stop me from trying. Or, two, I can push past and take the leap. I’m always saying in my blogs that you can do anything if you try. Time to start taking my own advice. Do I expect my first book to become a best seller? Not a chance. However, if people enjoy the story, and I slowly grow a fan base, my books will take off. I will always grow as a writer. In fact, I don’t think a perfect writer is out there. We are always growing and learning. If we don’t then our books will never grow. So, even in my doubt I will work towards publishing. After all, anything can happen, but only if I push through and try.